My friend and I went to White Horse Tavern today.  When I arrived she wasn’t there.  I sat at a table.  Adjacent to the table was another table with two chairs.  A pea coat was draped over the back of one chair.  When I sat down two guys at the bar looked back at me.

“Do you need this table?” I asked.  I noticed one was cute and one was older.

“No, no,” they said.

When my friend came, we ordered and began talking.  Soon enough the guys came over and claimed their table.  I wasn’t sure why they insisted on staying at the bar and saving a table for themselves.  Well, there we were, two guys and two girls sitting next to one another.  Conversation was bound to happen.  First though I had to put songs on the Jukebox.  I put on  Linger (Cranberries), Let’s Get It On (Marvin Gaye), Feeling Good (Nina Simone) and Ain’t No Mountain High Enough (Diana Ross.)
While I was choosing the songs I heard the cute one say he had bombed at a comedy club where he was in the company of many Jewish comedians.  So I sat back down, the older one went to the bathroom and the cuter one began talking to us.  It quickly became clear we had nothing in common.  He told many not great jokes.  I was impressed by how he kept going with them even though they weren’t funny.  I kept up a steady stream of laughter, because there was something likable about him.  One of his jokes was about how he was making “Pormedies”  Porn Comedies.  The second was going to be called Neurotica about Upper East Side Jewish ladies.  This was the second time he’d brought up Jewish people and he was from Louisiana.

I learned quickly that I couldn’t really pursue any line of conversation with these guys without it becoming a joke.  When the cuter one went to the bathroom, the older one talked and the conversation flowed better.

Later I walked home.  It was cold.  I really just wish they would end these wars, very tired of them.

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